Archive for 2007

Return from the Wilderness

OK, I haven’t been gone, really. But let me just say that when you work at home like I do, and things go wrong with one part of the work/life balance, it all goes to shit.

I have no one to blame, really, but myself. Just because you can do a job doesn’t mean that you should take the damned thing. And sure, the first six months were filled with energy, ego-stroking attention, and other good things.

But the travel killed me. It really did. And the more I travelled, the less I slept, the less energy I had, the more introverted I became, the more useless to pretty much every freaking person in the universe I became. I imploded.

Unfortunately, I denied much of it up until the end. And then one day, WOOSH, it crushed me into a little tiny ball and spit me out.

I should have seen it coming. But few trapped inside the event horizon can see beyond it. Thankfully, the collapse freed me from the things that had prevented me from seeing the problem — a problem that, admittedly, I’ve struggled with before. I had fallen down the not-writing rabbit hole again, and it took all my creativity and ability to think rationally along with it.

And now I have emerged. Well, I emerged last month, really, but I’m still sorting my shit out.

And here’s what I’ve sorted so far:I have to write to live. It has to be the center of my daily existence — it can be for work, or for myself, but I have to write every day. It isn’t a luxury; it’s essential to my sanity.

Call me “Timon” and I’ll claw your eyes out.

porcupine sleeping on the job at the National Zoo

pika pika (er…degu degu?)

As CS points out in comments, these don’t have visible tails, so I’m guessing these were actually degus and the display plate was wrong, or I just remembered it wrong.



pika pika, originally uploaded by packetrat.

pika



pika, originally uploaded by packetrat.

albino cockroach king



albino cockroach king, originally uploaded by packetrat.

At the National Zoo’s invertebrate exhibit.

Looking Back: Science Fair Projects Gone Wrong, March 2003